Ack, I almost forgot to write today. I’ve already made it 3 days in a row this week and I want to commit to writing everyday. Actually I AM committing to writing everyday, at least a little bit, because writing here does so much for keeping me moving forward. I am seeing my blog posts like stepping-stones that I am laying one at a time on the path in front of me. Step by step, inch by inch, I see myself clearer.
Tonight I am filled with gratitude for the wonderfulness that is my 3 children. I don’t write very often hear about them because this is the place to tell my story as I experience my life. I try not to tell other people’s stories or assume that I could possibly know what they are feeling or experiencing. I leave it to them to tell when and if they want to share. It is theirs and it is best to stick with telling my own.
Tonight though I am filled with such awe and love for all 3 of my kids that I need to just share a little bit. Each and every one of them reached out to me, requesting to spend special time with me alone. This from 3 teenagers – Kateri is 19, Soren is 18, and Demetri is 14. I’ve reveled in my time alone with each of them; being together, sharing stories, memories and ideas, making food, eating food, talking, laughing, dreaming, and helping each believe a little bit more in ourselves. Joy, just pure joy having these special moments with each of them, per their request!
I have always been “in love” with these wonderful people who I am deeply honored to call my own. There is nothing I love more than spending time with them. They are smart, loving, compassionate, respectful, fun, and amazing people. How I ever got so lucky to be their mom is beyond me!
Watching them grow and unfold in the past year and half has been a thing of mystery for me. I have watched as they have tried new things, met new people, learned to put self-care first and family a close second, been faithful to friends, made choices true to who they are seeking to become, found strength inside themselves they never knew they had, been willing to reach out for help as well as consistently reach out to others in need, and loved me and each other through it all. I’ve always loved watching them grow and learn, but this past year and a half has been an exceptional time of witnessing their inner awesomeness shine through.
I walk, with deep gratitude, alongside each one of them as they are finding their own way in this world. I walk with them trying to allow them to make their own choices and help them figure out the hard parts that sometimes arise from those choices. I trust them to always have my back and the backs of one another. I have more fun adventuring with them and learning about the things that bring them joy than I ever thought possible. Hearing each of them excitedly share with me something new they are trying is wonderful. Knowing that they believe I will always love them and support them no matter what helps me believe I am doing a whole lot of things right with them.
The stories of their lives are still theirs to tell. I’m just happy to say that my story has them in it if every single day. To love our children is a given I think. To like our children and have them like us right back – now that is pure gift!
Breathe and Be 